Liver: Ummm…what are we doing?
Me: testing something.
Liver: Testing…what? Because that looks like a lot more alcohol than you usually bathe me in…
Me: I saw a thing on YouTube and thought we’d give it a try. If it works, we might be able to help some folks on the internet.
Liver: And if it doesn’t work?
Me: It’ll work. Trust me. What’s the worst that will happen?
Liver: …I have a bad feeling about this.
And that is how my weekend went. I’d seen something called ZBiotics advertised on a YouTube BBQ show that I quite enjoy. They talked about science and breaking down something called acetaldehyde. And how that substance is the one that gives you the hangover. (They go into it in-depth on their website.) Well, this seemed just too good to be true for me.
But I thought, what the heck? I mean, I hate hangovers. Not that many love them. But I seem to be unusually susceptible to them. My Wisconsin forbears could drink all night and wake up to go fishing at 5 am the next morning with no noticeable effects. Me? If I have a third bourbon on an especially jubilant Friday night, then first thing Saturday morning, I’m reaching for the bottle of Advil and trying to sleep as long as possible. So I thought that even if it had a chance of working, it would be good to try. And then I spent the weekend testing it out. Here is how it went.
On Friday night, my wife and I cracked open one of the little bottles of ZBiotics each, just after she got home from work. We had a pre-dinner cocktail. Ate supper. A little while later, we had a bourbon. And then another before bed. More than I usually have, but not so much that it would be too out of the ordinary. And then, I went to bed fully expecting that there would be grogginess and a slight headache when I woke up Saturday morning.
But…no. I felt great! I was rested and ready to get on with my day. Same with my wife. So, does that mean it worked? Or was it a coincidence? I thought it worked. But it’s possible that I might have done something else that would help prevent a hangover without meaning to. And so I decided to try again. And this time, I kindly asked my wife not to have any as I wasn’t sure how this was going to end up and wanted to make sure that there was at least one responsible person in the house. I was going to try for four. Not because I particularly wanted four bourbons on a Sunday night, but if I was going to do more than spout marketing blurbs at you, I wanted to do this in a deliberate way.
So, once again, I drank the little bottle. Had a beer with supper. And then had at it for the next few hours. Man, was I happy. Just laughing and smiling. The doors were a little narrower than normal, but things were good. I was feeling great. Once I reached my fourth bourbon, I was done. Even in my oh-so-happy state, I knew that four bourbons and a beer in one night were at least a few too many. Then, my poor, suffering wife poured me into bed, and I went to sleep.
Monday morning was…not nearly as good as Saturday. I was certainly reaching for the Advil bottle. I slept as long as the dogs would let me, which wasn’t long enough. Then, I nursed coffee for the next few hours before trying to get some work done. I had a full-blown hangover. I joked with my wife that this entire post was just going to be “SEE WHAT I DO FOR YOU PEOPLE?!?” over and over again. And then I sighed and went back to feeling sorry for myself.
Final thoughts: I think that this worked well with a moderate over-indulgence. I really hadn’t felt that good after a third bourbon in a long time. But as far as pounding them down while pretending that you were still in college? Not really. Maybe it put a dent in it? If so, I hate to think what the day would have been like otherwise. But it certainly didn’t prevent anything, at least not for me. So my verdict is this: for $9 to $12 per little bottle (depending on the quantity you buy), I’d probably pass on it. It’s quite expensive when the alternative is just to drink less (which also works out to spending less on bourbon, too).
Once again, it turns out that the easiest and cheapest way to prevent a hangover is just to drink responsibly and not over-indulge. No matter what the YouTube BBQ guy is paid to say. That said, I’ll probably toss the remainder into my bag when I go on vacation this fall. I mean, maybe it does work if you practice moderation, and heck, I’ve already paid for them.